On International Women's Day

I think the reason so many women today say, "I'm not a feminist," is that there is now so much confusion about what "a feminist" actually is.

There are connotations about "man-hating".

There is the image of a bra-rejecting, makeup-free, masculine woman, trying to emulate a man in order to get ahead, and rejecting all her feminine qualities in the process.

There is the suggestion that much of the stress experienced by today's women is actually caused by the feminist goal of "having it all". Life was simpler before the feminists came and decreed we should be domestic-and-career-superheros, right?


I have to admit, I'm one of those women who, in the past, has used the phrase, "I'm not a feminist, but ..."


And the reason is this: I got married young. I never aspired to be a high-flying career woman. I don't have it in me. I may not be a girly girl, but I do like me a bit of red lipstick on the odd occasion. I may have always wanted to be a mum but, once I became one, she became the number one most important thing in my life. I love being a mother. I love being a stay-at-home mother. It's the best job I've ever had.


So I can't be a feminist, right?

Except ...

It's my choice to be a stay-at-home mum. Before Tiger, it was my choice to work.

It was my choice to go to university. I am allowed to vote. I am allowed to wear pants (thank heavens. I bloody hate dresses).

And, now I am a mum, I am thoroughly, thoroughly glad that feminism exists. Because I want her to have choices.

If she wants, like me, to be a mum, she can do it and good on her - this may be a "traditional female role", but it's an awesome, empowering one, and one only women can fulfil - could there be anything more "feminist" than that?

Conversely, if she wants to be a CEO or a lawyer or a doctor, or the fish-fingering Prime-Actual-Minister, yep, she can do that too!


I am sorry, now I have a daughter, that I ever said, "I'm not a feminist". I am, because I want her to live the awesomest life possible. Wearing pants, Getting dirty. Riding horses, breaking glass ceilings, changing the world ...


Or, quietly, changing one little person's world as a mother.

Whatever she wants. Whatever she chooses. Because that's why I do now say I'm a feminist. Because feminism gave us choice.


And choice is an exceedingly lovely thing.

~ Love, Miss Cackle x